Knowing Your Audience

I believe I have mentioned this in a previous post...but I think it is important enough to merit its own post.

I feel the high school curriculum should include a new course. I will call it "Knowing Your Audience".

I got in a fight with my close friend/co-worker today. She is the friend who had a baby and just returned from maternity leave on monday. She is clearly unhappy to be at work. I am a very flexible supervisor with a mindset of "if you get your work done, I don't care about your schedule". You can do what you need to do in your personal life as long as you get your work done. I am like this with all employees, not just those with new babies.

She was complaining today about the job and how she did not want to do it. She went on and on about how she did not want to help people anymore. That she wanted a part time job. That she wanted a corporate job. Even the corporate job she left to take her current job was better than this job. She wanted a fluff job. She went on and on and on.

I tried to be supportive. I really did. But this is where knowing your audience is helpful. She is going on and on about how miserable she is with this job (after a 3 month break) and how she wants to work part time to someone who is doing her best to be positive about the job because she is essentially STUCK there regardless. Because who is going to hire me and allow me to go to three therapy appointments a week?! And working part time is clearly NOT an option for me. I need benefits. I don't have the option of being on my husband's. Oh and yes, I need the full time salary too. Because IT IS JUST ME. I will need to work full time until retirement. Assuming retirement is an option.

I finally told her that I am NOT the person for her to be talking to about this. It must be nice to have choices. She told me that I could get another job. Sure. And when do I tell them about all the flexibility I will need?

It is great that people feel like can tell me everything. But I sure wish they would think sometimes before they do.

My friend seems to feel that having a baby and working full time is so overwhelming. Her mom is the baby's daycare provider. I am not saying that it is not overwhelming. But this is the same friend who has not offered to help with my kids or cook a meal or anything since my husband left. It is like all she can see is how "hard" she has it. But being left by your husband with two special needs kids and all of the responsibility of a house AND a full time job is apparently a piece of cake.

I will say this. At therapy appointment #2 this week, I was sharing with the therapist what had been going on and realized that the kids have actually been doing pretty well.

Three months into single parenthood, we are doing alright.