I am actually in a decent place though it won't sound that way because I am going to rant again. After seeing three happy couples today during the course of my activities, I am feeling rather irritated. Where the heck is MY happy ending?
Went for a hike this morning with a friend from work and her husband. Every time they referenced each other it was "babe". Ick. So not my thing. If I date a man and he calls me "babe" he will get a mouthful. Regardless, the clearly care about each other and of course, I want that.
Went to pick up my friend for a dance class and saw her husband. They are not sappy sweet. But he hangs out with their kids. Willingly. What a concept. I want that too.
Met some friends at the park. No real knowledge of the dynamic of their relationship. But he works full time and is a good dad. I'll take that please!
Don't tell me that I don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I know enough. I know their lives are not perfect. That the spouses are not perfect. But compared to what I have..well I will take it. With a big smile on my face.
On the plus side, I suppose it is fortunate that if anyone is lacking a partner it is me. It is amazing how so many girls are unwilling to do things without their partner or alone. Not an issue for me. I will do anything alone (and a good thing as it appears I have been ditched for hiking tomorrow by my crush). Clearly this is not the case with most others I know. My friend who just had the baby mentioned she did not want to bike ride alone. The husband of the friend I hiked with seemed very nervous about her being on a long hike. Women often don't do things on their own. Sad. Thank goodness I am not one of those because I would not be able to do half of what I do normally. Not
having a man will not stop me.
The guy I have the crush on said he would call tonight about hiking tomorrow but never did. Hard not to assume it means he has no interest in me. Though in all fairness not everyone wants to spend 8
hours in the mountains on one of their two days off. He could have called. I feel like if he was at all into me he would come. Maybe he does not want to go just with me. That makes me feel lousy.
The funny thing is I am not at all concerned about not having someone to hike with. I think I like
to have my little fantasy with this guy I have a crush on. If he does not call and does not hike...well I should not be fantasizing about him. And I admit I like the fantasy. So can he just give me enough so I can enjoy my crush? Yeesh.
So where exactly is my happy ending in all of this?
Happy endings are for fairy tales, most of us just have life...and the world is full or sorrows and joys!! You are going through a hard time right now, but it won't be this way forever. One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard was to "act happier than you feel". I've always tried that, and it's amazing that sometimes - not always but sometimes - I end up feeling as happy as I act!!
ReplyDelete